diary
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Counselling after sexual liberation
As usual, I started with the roundup of the past two weeks. I felt his delight…
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Magic, Grief, and a Real Fir Tree
So starts my first Christmas on my own ever… I’m home alone (ok, with the dog)…
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Little hands, quick years
Today I just want to pause in the simple joy of sitting on the floor and…
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Hypochondria, premonition – or just another day?
The trouble with having had a heart attack is an increase in, which I hope is,…
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Crossed wires and the film we didn’t see together
Friday nights at the cinema have become one of those small, anchoring rituals that I have…
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His Birthday, Our Old Conversation
The husband and I (we’re still married – at least for now) never talked about what…
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Pillion: Power, Desire, and Dinner After
Patricius and I went to watch the film Pillion; we had once both been into motorbikes…
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My Father’s Script, and Mine
My dad phoned just as I was leaving the house to take the dog on her…
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The Wages of Sin (Apparently) Are Haemorrhoids
London’s leather weekend was the most debauched I’ve ever been. Again, without going into details on…
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Debugging the Body: A Visit to the GP
About a week ago I sent an e-consultation to the surgery to ask whether the timings…
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London Leather: Epilogue and Afterglow
After the Leather Social, Cicero and I were both very tired and went straight to bed.…
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Starting to map the marriage
The first thing I did when Richard (my counsellor) arrived was apologise for breaching his privacy…
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Swiping across boundaries
In a bored moment, I was on one of the gay dating apps idly swiping through…
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A quiet rite by the sea
It’s been years since my husband last joined me on one of ritual trips to Clevedon.…
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Ball Pools and Broken Hearts
At the weekly cinema trip with Ambrosius, I was feeling tired and a little out of…
Eunuchorn 