Ambrosius and I caught the coach to Bournemouth; fifty minutes, partly motorway, partly through the forest. He’s good company and funny, so the time flew by.

There were only three other people on the coach, plus the driver, which felt relaxing. Two of them got off halfway there, so the coach was even quieter!

At Bournemouth we walked towards the town centre, noticing all the cafes and restaurants, and shopping along the way. The main central shopping area feels quite run down and sad – some British seaside towns have struggled since the seventies and the start of cheap flights to Spain and beyond.

We stopped for a hot chocolate on the way – he recommended a orange hot chocolate with a shot of coffee, which was dead tasty!

We went into a couple of shops in the way to the sauna.

The sauna itself is at the top of the hill beyond ask the shops. The front of the building looks like a closed down nightclub.

I didn’t try the door, but finally thought to buzz. Ambrosius noticed a chap inside waving: the door was already open.

The chap was a big fellow in his thirties; he had a beard and a few tattoos. After we paid, he gave us a towel each and a bangle with a locker key attached.

Once undressed and wearing nothing but a towel, we went to the bar and I ordered a double gin and tonic. I wanted to relax, unlike my previous two visits to a sauna. My first visit to a sauna was this one about eighteen months ago – with my husband. The second was about three months ago in Portsmouth.

This sauna has a comfortable and clean lounge area, with sofas and a TV – it also serves drink (alcoholic and non alcoholic) and food.

Once relaxed, we went to the jacuzzi, where we sat and chatted. He can be deliciously silly, which is quite attractive! Nobody bothered us; the sauna wasn’t busy.

We moved from the hot tub to the steam room to the hot room to the bar and back again, talking nonsense all the time, or else just quiet. It is special when you can be with somebody and not have to talk all the time.

We chatted with the bar-dude. I noticed his tattoos. “The four elements?” I asked. Ambrosius answered: “Avatar!”

He and the bar-dude talked about the various TV series for a while. Two of them! I exclaimed – what are the odds of that?

We repeated the cycle of jacuzzi, steam room, hot room, bar a couple of times. We both kept our towels on because I’d read that meant we weren’t interested in sex. However, everybody in the sauna was wearing a towel, so I am less certain that the etiquette held in this venue.

Sometimes, Ambrosius says “you’re going to fall in love with me”, which scares me because I cannot fall in love. I am still married – less than tree months out from from a relationship that lasted more than half of my life. I feel damaged, broken. I don’t know whether I will ever love again. Wondering why anybody would ever want me to love them. No, it wouldn’t be fair to even suggest that its possible – I tell Ambrosius no.

A worry is Ambrosius need for our mutual friend, Patricius, not to know when we spend time together. This upsets me because I have half-lived a life in shadow and secrecy and I have no wish to continue to live like that: I have fought too hard and paid too much to do it again.

I began to feel very dizzy when I stood up, whether from the jacuzzi or the various hot rooms. I thought I was going to pass out a couple of times. I asked the bar-dude for cheesy chips and a coffee in case it’s some kind of energy dip. I think that helped a little.

While we were at the bar, we chatted more about the various events at the sauna. Fridays is a trans night. There’s a leather/gear night once a month too – we were both excited about that!

Despite the delightful feel of the bubbles on my scrotal void, I wouldn’t have been able to make eunuch-goo for anybody: I suspect that the heat was making my blood pressure too low, hence the regular feelings that I might pass out.

It didn’t matter: I was in good company and relaxed.

This was a spa day with a friend – and a very good day it was too. It helped going to the sauna without the possibility of sex – it felt so much more relaxed for that reason and for the chilled company that Ambrosius gave me.

https://www.gaysaunabournemouth.co.uk/