After the – uh – educational experience at the sauna, I started wondering about hookup apps. I’ve never used one, although the husband is on Grindr.

I decided to ask my friend Cicero whether he used any and what success he had.

He said that he was on Grindr, Scruff, Growlr, Recon, and FabGuys, but generally did get much with them and most of his successes were face to face in clubs and pubs. I guess that London is big enough to support that kind of human interaction – out in the sticks, our queer kink options are more limited.

I had already used the online only app Sniffies, which seems to be best at locating cruising spots. I’ve never cruised – fear? I am not certain. I think it’s actually more I don’t know when it’s happening not how to signal that I’m up for it. Perhaps I should get a t-shirt “I am cruising: please wave if you’re interested.”

I wonder if the issue with cruising is common among neuro-divergent individuals. If anybody knows, pop a comment on the blog for me please!

I immediately ruled out Grindr as it would be upsetting for my husband if he found me on there. So, I asked Galateos which of those would be best for me. He recommended Scruff and Recon.

Scruff was available from the app store, Recon required that I hadn’t it special permissions to install. Apparently Google didn’t like it’s more overt sexual context. Both were easy to setup and create a profile on. Getting age verified was painful on both. Scruff couldn’t get the camera to work, although it did in the end. Recon the age verification is still pending – I guess that it’s a human assessment.

I had a quick look at both apps; there were a couple of guys close by who looked good, but it was late at night, so I shut the phone and read for ten minutes.

After reading, I picked up my phone for a quick game of Spider solitaire. Two guys had messaged me – one on each app.

One was about sixty miles away. He was hairy, but I had a sense that he was kinda desperate for company – I think he was trying to work out how to hook me: what he was saying didn’t match what was on his profile.

The other was smooth, and whilst I’d been drawn to his face (there was something of the Mediterranean about it), his profile declared that he was smooth. He was, however, a Dom.

I chatted with the smooth guy much more, he was definitely somebody who would be fun to play with – and, as I’ve observed elsewhere, “types” can be prisons that restrict choices and eliminate possible pleasures.

We chatted more. He’s more into rubber than leather. I do like the smell of rubber. He does like to dominate, but I got a slight switch vibe from him too. He’s had two long term relationships, but ended amicably, but it’s almost always sad when a relationship dies.

I told him a bit about me. He was kind and insightful.

Scruff was telling me that he was 735m away. So that was Berlin or Barcelona, somewhere if that kind of distance from Southampton.

This seemed like a fun late night chat, then the penny dropped: he wasn’t 735 miles away … he was 735 meters! Practically around the corner.

Fuck!

If I wasn’t so tired and wasn’t so late, I’d have made more immediate overtures. As it is, we have talked about meeting up for a coffee … damned! I might be on two weeks leave at the moment, but the next few days are chocca!

I cannot wait to meet him in the flesh … so to speak! 😉