I thought that it would be fun and fruitful to list some of the reasons that I love my husband!

1. He’s handsome

From the moment I saw him I lusted after him. He has aged beautifully.

The way we met is one of the most wonderful “origin” stories I have ever heard. I was living in a gay house share (one day I’ll finish writing the book about it that I started). One of the rooms was vacated and the landlord couldn’t make the viewing and asked me to show the chap around.

Well, when I opened the door I wanted to do much more than show this Adonis around the house – I wanted to take him straight to my bedroom and stay there … for a very long time!

I didn’t – I was too intimidated by his good looks – and how right he felt. We talked for what seemed like hours, but he left, and I didn’t expect to ever see him again.

A few weeks later, I received a letter from him! He wanted to explore things with me! I wrote back and over the period of a couple of months we met up a few times. At no occasion did we have any kind of nookie – we didn’t even kiss – we were that shy! What is remarkable is that I was a slut of the first order and would pursue a guy until he eventually gave up. I couldn’t move I was so in love.

He eventually moved to his own house share and we became a couple.

Even that first night I went to see him in his new home we only kissed as I left; we sat perched awkwardly on either side of the bed watching “Priscilla, Queen of the Desert”.

The next time we met dot dot dot!

2. He has his own unique style

So much so that people often complement him in it. I do feel proud that he expresses his unique personality so wonderfully through his he presents himself. Perhaps I should take inspiration?

I must admit, that I have felt put off by how well he dressed: my own style is best described as comfortable.

I was, however, flattered when I started wearing dungarees and he took to wearing them as well: for once I was the trend-setter!

3. He’s kind

He thinks about me, he buys little things that tell me that he gets me and he loves me. He thinks about my nephews and suggests presents. He’s also considerate, but he’s not a people pleaser. He won’t do something just to make somebody happy and win a few brownie points, but he will do things that will improve a person life or genuinely raise their self-esteem.

He has tried to work my difficulties in conversation into his own conversational style so as not to overwhelm me. I really appreciate that he tries to look after me in this way.

4. He’s damned clever!

He can do woodwork, wiring, plumbing, and gardening. Is an excellent baker and his Christmas puddings are to die for.

Yesterday he wired in a light-fitting that had been damaged in a recent flood. The switches were complicated three way affairs, but he got it sorted!

He can bake! Fabulous cakes! No two are ever the same because he is an instinctive baker.

5. He is honest

This is the character trait that defines him. His honesty and devotion to the truth, as he sees it, have cost him dearly in the loss of relationships. He is always honest with me. I have never had cause to doubt his word.

I can absolutely trust him to tell me how he is feeling about any issue. His straight-talking can be uncomfortable as he speaks inconvenient truths. Not just to me, but to anyone.

That said, he’s not one of these terrible people who use the truth to brutalise others – see number three: he is as kind as he can be. Being overly kind when attempting to tell things as they are can leave the listener not understanding what they’ve just heard (this is a fault I have).

6. He’s accepted my non-binary identity

This has meant so much to me, even though it shocked and undermined everything he believed about me and us.

Back to number three above – the little non-binary necklace he bought me for Christmas, the non-binary T shirt he got me at the same time, the unicorn statue he bought me – all small but significant symbols of his love and acceptance.

Its these things that make me feel loved – and his patience with me! Its not quite endless, but I feel that I am as close to living with unconditional love as an adult cam come to with another adult.

7. He’s emotionally insightful

Understanding feelings and anticipating how a person (eg me) might be feeling about an issue. Sometimes he can be challenging as a result, as his instinct tells him that there must be something going on, even when I am not able to access those feelings myself.

Its from his emotional insight that his compassion for others (including me) comes from. Its a loss to the world that he isn’t well enough to counsel at the moment – this is his vocation and, while he was working, he was respected by his colleagues and frequently asked for by name by respective clients.

8. He’s encouraged me to grow and challenge myself

From encouraging me to get my first programming job and supporting me when I went down the dead-end of gaining my personal training qualifications.

I never trained as a programmer. My degree was in Ancient History.

However, I had some experience with programming from a job I was doing at the time – as Office Manager! The company I was working for had some software that it had commissioned from some “professional” software developers. I figured that I could do it better. So I did.

My husband encouraged me to move to a real programming job – so I did!

In some respects, I wouldn’t be in the career that I am in without his support.

9. We have such a rich shared history

After twenty-seven years together we have had such amazing adventures and experiences.

We have been trekking in Nepal twice, where we experienced an earthquake, and we both bungee jumped! We both loved this amazing country.

We have been kayaking over a city sunken beneath the Mediterranean Sea.

Of course, we had a civil partnership, which was alter converted into a marriage. That was an amazing day that we planned and worked on together. We even designed, baked, and decorated the cake together – including make a couple of Fimo characters to put on the top to represent us.

We have seen more musical shows than you can shake a stick at. The first was Phantom of the Opera (which remains my favourite); I bought the cheapest tickets and hired tuxedos. We felt like pillocks.

We’ve also seen Steps and Lady Gaga live, and so many other things.

10. He’s great in bed

Honestly – the best!

I am blessed

I might be able to imagine a life without him, but I wouldn’t want to live it.

My life has been so rich thanks to my lovely husband.

Sometimes, I feel I could explode, I love him that much!