Check In

The hot flushes were worse than ever last night: I sweated buckets and the bed was soaking. However I did sleep better.

During this morning’s wash all the spotting on my undercarriage has gone! I’m nearly out of the lavender wound spray. I think I’ll miss that: I rather liked the smell. There are two stitches on my cock that seem to have the skin grown over them, which leaves the area feeling harder and less sensitive than the other parts of the scar. I’m able to give the scar a much deeper massage when showering and really enjoy the feeling, the smoothness is exciting!

I have chased the doctor and the NHS complaints department this morning. The doctor is currently on leave and had not sent the document she promised to send because she’s waiting for the outcome of the complaint. I chased the complaints people yesterday as well, and heard from them today: they have had a holding reply from the hospital (“we are experiencing a high number of complaints at the moment; your complaint is important to us and we will respond in two weeks time, if you are still alive”). So I am stuck for at least two weeks. I’m getting a bit cheesed off with relying on the system to grind into gear.

I’m feeling a little pissed off about this whole hormone thing!

---

I’m not alone

Funny the random people you talk to online. Some people I chat with once or twice and never hear from again. Some people say “hello” and that’s the end of the conversation. The are a few that I have been in continual communication with for a long time, and whilst I have not converted any online friendship into a flesh-and-blood friendship, I do count them as friends and have even had a video call with one of them.

Also curious that I’ve used the phrase “met online”. I can’t think of another way to put it.

There is always the question of veracity: is this chat from an authentic person, or is it somebody pretending to be a whatever for thrills or scamming? How can I tell the difference?

Often people hide their true identity on the web for their own protection (I do in a number of social networks), so I’m saying that people can be authentic in their interactions, whilst withholding personally identifiable information. The body issues that have affected me and others like me can carry a lot of shame and misunderstanding from the wider world: anonymity is essential.

That does make spotting scammers harder. I will say here that there is nothing wrong with fetishists, I’m one after all!

One dead giveaway that somebody is into me as a fetish because of my castrated status is asking for photographs very early on in a conversation. I am not going to share photos of my privates for the world to see; cool people will understand when I say “no”, creeps will generally stop messaging. 

I still don’t absolutely know how to detect people scamming. The best thing is to only reveal personal information slowly and reciprocally (and verifiably, by which I mean that you can develop a trust by checking details) and only after a considerable period of chat. Nobody has asked me for money yet: that would be an immediate block. I would say asking for money by anybody online would ring bells and wave flags of all sorts.

I have met so many marvellous people, many of whom have helped me on my journey, many of whom have broadened my perception of the world I live in and opened my mind to the limitless possibilities of existence. I would not have made it without them. These funny online people have literally saved my life at times. They have my gratitude.

I think I’m going to have to return to this subject of online friends in the future; there is a lot here to consider.

All that said, I think it’s an honour to be somebody’s fetish though 😜!